Paul the Apostle was quoted in Romans 12:16 “Be of the same mind one toward another. Mind not high things, but condescend to men of low estate. Be not wise in your own conceits.“
To condescend is the Greek word synapago which means to yield or submit one’s self to lowly things and conditions, to take off together, i.e. transport with. In more practical terminology it means to waive the privileges of rank and enjoy the company of others regardless to their station in life. Be willing to adjust in various environments when certain cultures, traditions and customs are not like yours. Be adaptable and learn to think quick on your feet. I heard a beatitude that once said “Blessed are the flexible, for they shall not be bent out of shape.” Don’t function with so much rigidity one dimensionality until you think you’re too good to be in certain environments and around certain people when necessity may call for it. You might be doing well financially and socially but that’s no reason to look down on other people because of their current condition. Things may change for them and when people are up they will vividly remember how you treated them when they were down. If we were not born in wealth and among nobility you have had to work to arrive where you are and you haven’t always been where you are. Some individuals we encounter may in fact be on the journey we have been on and we have to leave room for empathy, compassion, and understanding by identifying with the struggle of others. Of course you don’t have to apologize for success or obtaining achievements but allow your conduct among others to be “others focused” and not “self-focused” if you want to be successful in building rapport and healthy relationships among those you encounter.
The last thing we need to be is condescending which is to have a superior attitude toward others. In layman’s terms, to look down your nose at someone else. In all facets of society, a condescending disposition is so prevalent among so called professional and spiritual individuals. Just because you work in a certain profession, hold a number of earned degrees, live in an exclusive neighborhood in your city of residence, drive a particular automobile and wear certain brands of clothing does not make you a better person than someone else. Of course only a condescending person will size themselves up to someone else to feel that they are better than someone else. This is an indication of inferiority complex. To belittle someone or speak to them in a tone of contempt reveals arrogance and egomania on the part of these condescending individuals. But we have to be mindful of the old adages “what goes up must come and down,” and “you could be up today and could be down tomorrow.” Watch your talk, watch your tone, watch your temper. You never know who you may need one day. The way some people are treated and talked to by others is unconscionable. The way one spouse will talk to another spouse, the way a supervisor will talk to an employee, the way a pastor will talk to his/her congregation, the way colleagues interact with one another, the way representatives of one ethnic group deals with representatives of another ethnic group. Our general society has lost the ability to practice people’s skills, decorum, respect for the dignity and intrinsic worth of human kind. Customer service representatives in local retail stores and restaurants treat customers with contempt and many times it’s in the reverse. It’s so refreshing to deal with people with manners and respect where they will actually greet strangers and initiate conversation if they know them or not. Sometimes the course of a person’s life can drastically change because for the first time in their lives someone is willing to condescend by treating them like a valuable human being that they are. It gives them hope among their depression, suicidal tendencies and overall frustration with the challenges of life. Remember the slogan Ellen Degeneres would use at the end of her talk show, Be Kind To One Another.
Dr. Bennie E. Calloway, III 